In Buddhism there is a Sanskrit term, Upādāna, which can be defined as attachment, grasping, or clinging. In its various forms, it’s one of the principle causes of human suffering.
In reference to clinging, at the end of this year, I have an important career decision to make: do I take my Family Medicine Boards in mid-2023, which will extend my Family Medicine Board Certification for another decade?
Now, I don’t currently see myself in clinical practice ever again, so I don’t have a practical reason for taking them. And preparing for this board is costly, both in terms of time and expense. For example, for the method in which I prepare for these types of tests—which I would call the “shock and awe” approach—it will mean spending about 200 hours (5-6 weeks) of intense study, and cost me a few thousand dollars. Also, there is the opportunity cost: I certainly won’t be writing much during my study time!
Yet a part of me still wants to take this test and keep my board certification.
So I am clinging to something? Am I afraid to let go of my old physician persona, and fully commit to writing as a profession?
Perhaps.
Yet there is one other factor that may counter this: I love the subject matter for itself. The science of medicine is amazing, and a chance to review it once again, in depth, is difficult to resist.
Maybe this will be enough? I will know in about a year.